Fr. Rich's sermon today was about how we often get things half right when it comes to God. We think we know what things are about, but we sometimes only know the half of it. Luckily, God seems to have a better grip on the big picture and whenever we are unsure of things, we can trust him to know what's going on, right?
Whenever I get a tug that God wants me to do something, my response to him is always:
"ok, but you have to give me the strength to do it."
I will basically agree to do almost anything knowing that in myself there is not the strength or courage or brains to do it, but God has all those things and can lend some of those attributes to me for awhile.
Last week, after the fiasco with the kids wiggling in the pew, I left Grace wondering if it was time to hit the road and find a new church. Again.
On Tuesday I went to the bible study. On Thursday I got a call from the assistant Rector asking if I would be willing to facilitate a Lectio Divina group for Adult RE on Sunday mornings. This, for all of you who know me, is God throwing me a bone.
Now, it is true, I would prefer if someone else were facilitating the Lectio Divina group since I am trying to avoid leadership roles, but I have been dying for such a thing since I joined Grace almost a year ago, so if God is asking me to do it, I say YES! And ask him to give me the tools to do it as he wills.
This morning I recruited one woman for the group and next week we are going to start. I am really excited.
In other news, I had a big fight with my kids about having to go to church at all today and I ended up yelling at them, at Nguyen, and finally shutting myself in my room for a good cry. Then I pulled myself together and dragged them, kicking and screaming, to church. I was grateful for the corporate confession. And grateful that they were a little quieter than last week.
I throw this one right back at God:
Beloved, You keep telling me loud and clear that you want us at Grace. You know as well as I do that I am not 100% comfortable there. You know I am willing to be there for as long as you want me to be. Thanks for the Lectio Divina thing. I am really really grateful. And please give me patience with the boys.