Wednesday, November 04, 2009

Paper bag

I feel, sometimes, like I am trying to carry too many groceries in a bag that is a little tattered. There are holes. The top is frayed. Stuff pokes out.

And not pretty stuff, either. Not the baguettes and a bottle of wine. Not fruit and cheese.

Nope. What slips out of my ratty old bag is a half eaten bologna sandwich and a banana peel.

(What in God's name is she going on about, you ask.)

I am carrying too much sometimes. Too much at work. Too much in my family. Too much in my church, even. Just too much stuff. And most of it is high quality, good stuff. But what comes tumbling out of my bag when the seams begin to pull apart is the darkness. The isolation. The frustration, the exhaustion.

At least, that is what pours out when you ask me to put the bag down, empty the contents on the table and begin to try and sort through it all.

This morning, I almost couldn't fit it all back inside.


Anonymous said...

Hey there sister,
Time to re-learn lessons about self-care! Are you keeping up with your spiritual direction? Meeting regularly with folks in ministry to share and support each other? These things keep you in shape for the hard work of ministry!

Now that my soapbox is warmed up, excuse me while I go repeat this in the mirror...

Much love,

Rachel Nguyen said...

Yeah, Amy. No kidding.

Thank God for spiritual direction! And bible study. And daily prayer.

I definitely need to work on the sharing this with other people in minsitry part. It really is an isolating thing sometimes, isn't it?

And maybe we can meet for cheeseburgers!

Rachel Nguyen said...

And work on spelling ministry, LOL.

Anonymous said...

Let's find time to share a meal and some stories. At this hectic time of year in the parish, it's more important than ever.

One of the rules my mentors have taught me: There are no lone rangers in ministry. At least, not for long. I thank God for those brave enough to kick my backside with these things. :^D

Call or email to make plans!

Mary Beth said...

haven't read you in a long time (Why? too busy?!)

sending love and prayers.