I am still a sensitive high school kid under this pulled together exterior. Sometimes the cool kids don't invite me to the party and I want to go in the girl's room and cry about it.
But damn it.
As a Christian, I think I am supposed to grow out of that. I am supposed to worry about what I can do for God. What I can do for others. Not what others may or may not think of me.
Sigh.
It is hard to break a lifetime of habits.
6 comments:
Yes, it is hard. If it makes it any easier, I think most of us wrestle with the same issue. Ha, at least I do and I find that I'm not all that unique. We can pray for each other.
kate
Kate again.
I forgot to thank you for turning me on to Habib Koite & Bamada. We purchased the album and haven't stopped listening to it since the day you wrote the post and we got it. Thank you for spreading the good word!
Hey Kate,
Thanks for your comments! Isn't Habib amazing? He came to RI a couple of weeks ago for a fundraiser and I had the great pleasure of seeing him and the band live. It was extraordinary!
I posted about it on my other blog:
The Big Bang
I am with you, in the locker room. I am glad to know neither one of us is alone, and that God invites us, always.
"...that He may live in us , and we in Him..."
To be "rejected...despised..a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief" is to really feel it, even more so perhaps than as a teenager---and not to "be an expert in the topic of rejection" or to use Life in Christ as a shield or anesthetic.
May The Holy Spirit link your cross to His Cross to continue to transform you.
God bless you, Rachel.
P+
AND I LIKE YOUR NEW PICTURE
it's more like you, I think
Hey Rachel,
We are never alone, it's true. It makes me happy when I remember that.
Dear Peter,
Thank you for your comments. I think, for me, the biggest difference between then (adolescence) and now is that I am not afraid to experience pain. I don't try and run away or deny it or bury it. Sometimes, I even remember to pray about it. And yes, somehow connect it with Christ's own suffering. It is helpful to remember that as Christians, we still experience pain.
I am glad you like the new picture. It is of me playing my djembe at Black Rep on my 43rd birthday. Pure joy!
Love,
Rachel
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